9 Steps You Should Take After a Breakup
Throughout your life, people will come and go. You’ll meet new people and fall in love, and you’ll also get heartbroken. When the latter happens, it will be devastating. You might even find yourself lying in bed shoveling a pint of ice cream into your mouth.
After a breakup, comforting yourself with sweet treats and cheesy rom-com is a great way to cope. You should take that time to process the heartbreak you just endured. But it’s equally important to lift yourself back up and work toward a healthier and happier you. If you’re going through a breakup, here are nine tips to get you feeling better than ever.
1 Talk It Out
Ending your relationship can leave you feeling empty and with a lot of questions. You’ve spent hours opening up to and being vulnerable with your ex-partner. You’ve created countless memories with them. And now it’s over.
After your breakup, take time to process the end of your relationship. Talk to the people in your life whom you trust the most about how you’re feeling. Whatever you do, don’t isolate yourself from the people who love you. Your closest circle is there to support you through the good times and the bad.
2 Prioritize Your Health
Unless you’re actively trying to conceive, contraceptives are fairly essential in a long-term relationship. After a breakup, though, you may have let your prescription lapse. As you begin to meet new people again, it’s time to consider adding birth control to your health regimen.
There are several different forms of birth control you can implement into your routine. From the pill to the shot, you can decide what works best for your lifestyle. With today’s technology, you can order your birth control online and get it delivered right to your door in discreet packaging. Now you don’t have to worry about those nosy neighbors knowing your business.
3 Take a Day Off
When you’re overcome with sadness, you’re probably not going to be your most productive self. If you don’t think you’ll be able to keep the tears at bay during the workday, take the day off. Know that it’s OK to take some personal time to lick your emotional wounds. This is the perfect time to grab that pint of ice cream and get some rest.
4 Set Boundaries With Social Media
You’ve probably had those urges to virtually check in on your ex after a breakup to see how they’re doing. But this rarely leads to feelings of joy, making it even harder to move on.
A simple way to stop checking on your ex via social media is by simply blocking, unfollowing, and unfriending them. This is easier said than done, but you can feel relief with just the tap of a few buttons. If you’re constantly fighting the urge to peek at your ex’s profile, identify what creates this urge. Did you see a meme that reminded you of them or a clip from their favorite movie? If so, you might consider unfollowing the sources of those posts, too, until you’re feeling better. Understanding what gives you these urges will ultimately help you avoid them.
5 Throw Out the Mementos
It’s tempting to keep that sweater that still smells like your ex. But think about what feelings you get when you pick it up. Are you smiling? Or are you holding back tears? If you answered yes to the second question, then it’s time to do a purge.
Throw out, donate, or repurpose all of the gifts your ex gave you. The longer you keep these things, the longer you will get sucked into reliving the past. Those memories will hold you captive as long as you let them. So say goodbye to that sweater. You’ll be closer to a clearer and happier mindset when you do.
6 Consult a Therapist
Maybe long chats with your pals aren’t doing the trick. Then it’s time to call in a pro. Talking to a therapist can help you grow at any point in your life, especially after a breakup.
Your therapist can help you overcome the issues from your previous relationship so you can thrive in your next one. Therapy can also help you find yourself again. After being in a relationship for a long time, it’s possible to lose parts of yourself. Whether those are friends or hobbies, your therapist can help you recover these pieces of yourself. Therapy can be a crucial part of healing after heartbreak, so find a therapist whom you can easily confide in. Your future self will thank you.
7 Try a New Hobby
When you’re in a relationship, you give much of your precious free time to your partner. It’s time to take that time back and focus on you.
Trying your hand at a new hobby will help keep you busy and focused on mastering a new project. Try nurturing a houseplant, sign up for a fitness class, or volunteer with an organization you’re passionate about. Any of these will help open your eyes to new skills and passions that you never knew you had.
8 Be Realistic
After a breakup, it’s normal to look at your relationship through rose-colored glasses. But once you take those off, you’ll start to see all of the faults in your relationship.
Instead of romanticizing memories of your ex, be realistic about what was wrong in your relationship. Please make a list of these flaws and keep them with you. When you start to miss your ex, refer back to your list of all of the reasons it didn’t work out.
9 Recognize That Recovering Takes Time
Regardless of how long you were with your ex, a broken heart doesn’t heal overnight. It’s going to take time and — more than likely — a lot of tears.
Some days you might feel wonderful and whole again. Other days, you might see something that reminds you of your ex and feel the pain all over again. That’s normal, and you shouldn’t beat yourself up for it. Everyone heals at their own pace.
As you work on bouncing back from a breakup, remember that you’re not alone. Talk to your friends. Work through the insecurities brought on by your past relationship with a therapist. It’s time to quit romanticizing your ex and glorify your single self instead. Once you’ve recovered from your heartbreak, you’ll be happier and healthier than ever.